complete the thought...

... a list in the style of a list from McSweeney's...

I almost married her. She was perfect in every way but one...

...she was dead.
...she was a he.
...she was 23 and I was 12. She was not into preteens.
...she had three elbows.
...she had four elbows.
...she was a Nazi.
...she was made of uranium.
...she did not believe in dinosaurs.
...she was inflatable. Actually, she was perfect. We honeymooned in the Himalayas.
...she was a leper.
...she had no neck.
...she was a silverback gorilla.

Please, feel free to add your own.